What's 1000 times cuter than the World Cup?

Saturday was Fin's first soccer game. Notice how the goal flag thingys are bending in the gale force arctic wind? He seemed not to mind.

In unrelated news, there's a huge sale going on in my Etsy shop. Drastically reduced prices!

It bears repeating.

Have you seen this? Surely, you have. But, it bears repeating. Don't you love Billy Collins? I do. You know who else I love? Jimmy Carter.

And you!

Already, right?

Is it autumn already? I don't know, but Fin enjoyed some fall goodness today crunching thru the dry leaves next to the Post Office.

Also, I feel like I might be boring you. Like I can feel your stifled yawns and furtive can-we-leave-yet? looks at your significant others through the mighty internet. Is it so? Am I not bringing my a-game? Maybe, I'm boring myself. Wouldn't be the first time.

In unrelated news, I was typing my name today and for a second, I hesitated (after misspelling my first name) because I couldn't remember my last name. It's not the name I've always had - it's my married name, but I've had it for almost twelve years now. What's up with that?

ps. I was not at all drunk at the time, thanks for asking.

It's a scorcha!

Finally. One-hundred-seven degrees isn't um..... optimum? But it is what's expected in these here parts..... Funny that summer has arrived just as school starts. Not funny haha. Funny.

My baby went to school today.

What I am allowed to say out loud: My baby went to school today. My youngest child, my little boy is growing up so fast. In my head he practically has a mustache and car keys. Sigh.

What I am allowed to think but not say out loud: My baby went to school today. In bringing him to kindergarten, I have delivered him into a world full of joy and learning and friendship, but also failure and rejection and hazing. School will soon replace me as the biggest influence in his life and, as much as I'd like to, I can't completely protect him from the things that might break his heart. And that breaks my heart.

What I am neither allowed to think nor ever say out loud: My baby went to school today. And with him went my excuse for not getting fuck-all and/or the dishes done on any given day.

Oh. And that light is crooked.

Before school starts....

Have a couple of carrots, forty candles, musical guests and little kids dancing. It's the only way to say goodbye to summer. (Especially if you secretly hope summer will stick around for a few more weeks.) Don't try to get the kids to eat the carrot cake, though. It's as if there's a vegetable in it.

OMG, you guys.

Something is very very wrong. Everything I have done (tried to do) this week has gone pear-shaped or taken 8 times longer than it should have or generally been a major hassle and I don't know what to do. Honestly, my luck has to change soon, right? RIGHT?

So, if anyone wants to volunteer to do my chart and tell me what's what, they should please go ahead. I will be here, trying to breathe.... It's okay if I have a beer and watch Project Runway while I'm breathing, right? I think it is.....

School shoes.

Remember these? I had a pair just like them in High School. I was rather fond of them. I have always believed that if you have participated in any particular trend - neon, leg warmers, enormous flannel shirts with the sleeves cut off, asymmetrical haircuts - you are not allowed to participate again when it comes back. You are disqualified. You are too old and therefor ridiculous.

But. (You knew that was coming, right?) I had to make an exception for a lavender suede version of the above Minnetonka moccasin and they are delightful. They make me feel like I have back to school clothes even in that "it's a little too hot to wear this but I'm so excited that I will anyway" way. Heaven.

Also, wearing them around the house is what's getting me through a morning on which I otherwise feel like crying. For reasons that are too complicated and (frankly) lame to go into. Gr.

Music and missing my monkeys.

My monkeys have gone to Disneyland with grandma and grandpa, leaving me to toil in my sweatshop, alone, listening to angry-white-girl-complaint-rock from the nineties.

Rock on, Veruca Salt!

5. Play miniature golf

Turns out, Seamus can putt. He's kindof an all-star, when he's concentrating and no-one is throwing things at him. Of course, that can probably be said for any professional golfer.... Fin is a very consistent player, racking up 7 to ten strokes on every par 3. Mama is seriously spastic, with a hole-in-one, followed by like a sixty-five. That windmill was relentlessly in my way.

The crappy part of a nutritious breakfast.

I'm not anti-television. There's a part of me that would like to be all creative art projects and wooden toys. But. Yeah. I don't know.

Anyway, I like TV. But. Recently my children (who also like TV) have graduated from the Charlie and Lola Yo Gabba Gabba genre to the Sponge Bob Square Pants Penguins of Madagascar genre. The difference (primarily) being that Sponge Bob Square Pants and Penguins of Madagascar have commercial beaks. So, my kids are new to cereal commercials and this is what I have to say about that: Commercials work really well on children, and I don't care how much they cry in the cereal aisle, I am not buying Reese's Puffs or Cookie Crisp. Or any other cereal named after a candy or dessert item. The End.

Because that's where I draw the line. Who am I kidding?

In other news, I have 554 sales in my Etsy shop. And since 555 is such a beautiful roundish lovely number, which seems auspicious in every way, Sale Number 555 will get a big prize! So, go shopping. The End.

Friday, I'm in love....

Home.

Trade shows? Are fun, but I'm super-glad I don't do that full time....

Home now, and getting reacquainted with my household. And the housework. Because no-one is able to wash clothes or buy food without me. Nor take out the recycling. Nor flush the toilet.

Honestly, I leave for like fifteen minutes and they go all Lord of the Flies on me.